Trade mother In

Me and Nellie frockling in the spring grass

Me and Nellie frockling in the spring grass

Greeting loyal readers.  Well, Me and Nellie have made a decision. We want a new mummy.  The one we currently have is useless.  Yet, again she has forgotten to buy us our doggy biscuits, so Me and Nellie did not have any morning dinner.  What are We to do?  No, morning dinner.  Since Nellie has been on her anti-whale diet, We don’t even have any back up doggy roll to eat.  We demand a new mummy.  One that will remember to go to the supermarket and once there remember to buy Us our doggy food, instead of remembering that she forgot to get any doggy biscuits as she pulls up to the driveway.  We live in the countryside and any supermarket is a half hour drive away.

We want a mummy who:

  • Lets Us inside, regardless of our muddy paws and wet fur,
  • Doesn’t continually moan about snowy white fur all over the carpet, living room furniture and any dark coloured clothing in the house,
  • Lets Us go walkabout when ever We want and doesn’t yell at Us and tell Us we are bad dogs just because We want to go and visit the neighbours,
  • Doesn’t go to work and forgets to feed Us.
  • Lets Us play with those silly rabbits and chase those peasky chickens,
  • Most of important of all: Remembers to buy our doggy food.

What do loyal readers think?  Should We trade our mummy in for a newer, more improved model?  Love Nellie and Jasper, two very hard done by maremmas.

Warning maremmas in charge

Warning maremmas in charge

 

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19 Responses to Trade mother In

  1. The problem with Mummies is that they are human and therefore prone to forgetfulness, no matter how devoted they are to Us.

    We also live at least half an hour away from any supermarket, so when the cupboard is bare it can be quite dire. Our Mummy has learned to make up for any disasters in the biscuit stocking department by looking in the mystery white box: the deep freezer. There are often very juicy frozen bones in there. And also steaks. And old lamb shanks.

    We bet your mummy has all sorts of treats in her white box. She needs to realise that she can turn an act of neglect into one of generosity.

    Give her another chance (she does seem very devoted to you in most ways), make sure she reads this blog so she can see the light, and await the joy of a frozen bone or juicy steak when next she forgets the biscuits! Soon you will be welcoming the pesky chooks into your food bowl, and destroying Mummy’s shopping list when she goes shopping.

    Remember to err is human, to forgive divine, and therefore so easy for a Maremma to do…

    love

    Freya and Rosamond in hot stinky Queensland, where juicy bone blocks are the best treat for summer

    • Greetings to our Queesland cousins. We have not heard from you for a while. Me and Nellie know all about that great white magical box, however, mummy and daddy seem to be reluctant to open it. They mutter something about Christmas and daddy’s birthday party and how they need to not to use its contents until then. One good thing has been that mummy has felt guilty about her forgetfullness and she has give Me and Nellie extra rations for our evening dinner. Love Nellie and Jasper.

  2. Kyla says:

    Judge Kyla of the Global Canine Court hereby finds the defendant, mummy, guilty on two counts:
    1) Failure to provide dog food, a life threatening omission.
    2) Failure to provide a quality of life-no treats is a major bummer.

    The rest of the charges are just fluff-they don’t amount to a hill of beans unless you’re fed.

    Because the accusers have such good hearts and have pleaded for leniency in this case. mummy is on lifetime probabtion. Do it again and incur the wrath of this Supreme Canine Court, mummy doesn’t want to find out what that means.

  3. Katie says:

    We are so sorry you’re having mummy troubles. You know, I bet a whole bunch of your fans would jump up and down to take you but we think your mummy would be so sad. Threaten enough and she will widen up!

    Oink oink,
    Katie and Coccolino the mini pig

  4. I have to be the voice of reason here…give your mummy a break. Oh, wait. That’s my Mom speaking. Mom? Get a grip. They didn’t get their Morning Dinner. Do you understand? That means no food. NONE. I think your mummy should be in the kitchen RIGHT NOW cooking special dog treats to make up for this indiscretion.

  5. Bert says:

    Patience My friends, Patience. The humans are very slow to learn and many of them are getting so old that they forget easily and often.

    Just love her more…….
    I mean, think about it, what if you ended up wiith a worse one…..It could happen.
    bert

  6. catchatcaren says:

    Noooo you should NOT trade in your Mummy!! It could be worse. You could have MINE!

  7. Zena says:

    I cannot imagine being forgotten! Forgotten! How could she forget your food? Are you not the best and most important Maremmas in the land?
    Wet/muddy paws – they are all like that believe me!
    I think if she shows remorse and makes attempts to remember in future you should give her a hard few hours and then forgive her. After all, people are not dogs, they can be pretty useless in a variety of ways. Very disappointing really, I don’t know why we put our time into trying to train them!

  8. Boomdeeadda says:

    I can sympathize with you and with mummy. I repeat ‘outloud’ everything I do lately, like “I’m locking the door”. Otherwise, I’m 5 minutes from home and turning around because I don’t remember if I locked the darn door. Maybe you’ve had days like that too..like if you forget where you buried a favourite bone? I recommend lots of love and kisses for mummy before she goes so that she is thinking of your sweet love the whole time she’s grocery shopping.

  9. Dougall says:

    Peeps never seem to forgets their OWN dinners!

    • Tell Me and Nellie about it. They are all very interested in what they are having for dinner but when it comes to feeding Me and Nellie it all goes astray. Though mummy says it doesn’t look like Me and Nellie are starving. Oh how little she knows.

  10. No breakfast?? That’s harsh!! I think you should walk muddy paws through the house in protest!

  11. A wise dog said: you know what you have, but you don’t know what you will get – so I wouldn’t trade in your mom, or maybe for not more than a brandnew SUV :o)

  12. Will and Eko says:

    The grass is always greener…

  13. onebluedog says:

    The trouble is, you never know what sort of mom you will get next…but if you are really determined to try a new one, maybe you can ask Santa for Christmas 🙂

  14. grouchoandt says:

    Oh dear, this is a problem. See I too have to contend with Her who won’t let me do what I want when I want and says things like “it’s for your own good” – really – so not being allowed to eat all the treats in the world us for my own good??? Hmmph I’m not sure I agree with that. But really, I know it is all out of an amazing love for us that they do these things and sometimes they just get busy with all the stuff that they forget things but it doesn’t mean they love us any less! And it looks like you live on a rather amazing place so all up probably better to just give an exasperated sigh and keep training her!! That’s what I do – currently training her to give me more treats ….

    Woof

    Groucho

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